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Tips on how to date a Dutch guy or girl

An introduction on how to date Dutch men and women
Quite often your can hear or read funny comments from foreigners on how difficult it is to date a Dutch man or woman. This simple guide to dating Dutch guys or girls in The Netherlands will hopefully help you along. By explaining some of the characteristics, habits and popular generalisations you will understand Dutchies a bit better and therefore be more prepared for your future dates in Holland. Some common myths, sterotypes and misconceptions will be also be debunked or explained. Of course all of this is subject to opinion and discussion. There are no absolute truths or rules in this case. In general the dutch are known to be free spirited, well educated, friendly, humoristic, open minded and down to earth but when it comes to dating things may not be what you expect. This can be caused by cultural difference, upbringing, experience, attitude, personality, income, emancipation etc.

Why dutchies prefer to date foreigners rather than eachother
There seems to be an unhealthy competition between the opposite sexes in Holland. Women seem to be totally self obsorbed and men just couldn’t care less. This leaves many with no choice but to look outwards. Since online dating and dating apps have become the norm it’s easy to make contact with people from around the world. Some just dream of an exotic lover while others are just fed up with the locals and try their luck with love abroad. Men have a tendency for eastern european ladies or asians and women are drawn to the southern latino type of a man. The rest stay lonely or find a dutch partner. Keep in mind that women get a lot more attention then men in the online dating game. Therefore they have a lot of options and can be very picky.

What to expect from dating Dutch men?
The ideal dutch guy is confident, hard working, sporty and tall but when it comes to dating they are quite often clueless. No etiquette at all. You will find that they are often not very romantic, rather cheap and direct to the point with poor manners sometimes. The whole ‘being a gentlemen’ thing is considered to be old fashioned or not emancipated so don’t expect them to bring flowers, open doors, pull out chairs or hold up your coat. Spliting the bill or ‘going dutch’ as it is called, is considered a fair and reasonable practice, especially among students because they have little money. If you can look past this you just might have chance to build a great relationship.

Dating a stereotype Dutch woman
The ideal dutch girl is a tall blonde cutie with a good heart but be aware of their feministic traits. Emancipation in Holland has led to total freedom and independence for most women. This is good thing but some dutch women feel a bit too empowered by this and can therefore behave very much like their male counterparts. There isn’t much tradition or emphasis on behaving like a lady which is why dutch women can sometimes come across a bit masculine and not sexy. Feministic behaviour could be a turn off for some but refreshing to others. Opposites attract they say but you better be strong enough to handle her?

Which part of Holland is your date from?
Since Holland is a small country it has always looked outwards. Most Dutch people like to travel and meet people from other cultures no matter where they live. Please keep in mind that eventhough Holland is very tiny you can find quite a few differences in dialect, customs and attitude per region. Like in most countries the biggest differences are between the big cities and the more rural areas. The Dutch themselves like to divide Holland in above and below the big rivers (North and South). Amsterdam is a very cosmopolitan touristy place and therefore quite unique in it’s own right. So in conclusion, location could play a role in certain behaviors too.

Common mythes about the Dutch
Dutch people are rich
Holland itself is a very rich country but most people have a low to average income for the living standards. After paying all the bills and high taxes there isn’t much left usually. Sorry for the gold diggers out there. Many love the student life sometimes studying till the age of 30. Earning money is not really a priority then and for the most part people are not very materialistic.

Do Dutch women really approach men for dates?
This won’t really happen out of the blue, but if they know you a bit there are ladies who are willing to take a chance.

Does everybody speak English?
Languages are studies from a young age so yes many people do indeed speak english.

Do Dutch people still wear wooden shoes?
No, not really. Just some farmers in the country side.

Do all Dutch people smoke marijuana or cannabis?
Of course not. Since it’s not a forbidden fruit

Best free dating sites in Holland
Lexa, Parship, Pepper, Relatieplanet, E-matching

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